CHOOSE YOUR OWN ENDINGS (Deuteronomy 3)

At last Moses expresses his hurt over not seeing the promised land.

In his final sermon series to Israel, he tells them about his prayer:
     God, my Master, You let me in on the beginnings, You let me see Your greatness, You let me see
     Your might--what god in Heaven or Earth can do what You have done! Please, let me in also
     on the endings, let me cross the river and see the good land over the Jordan, the lush hills, the
     Lebanon mountains. 

Oh, Moses. I want to see it too.

In case you don't already know, God's answer was "no."

Moses came so close.

I have seen God's greatness, not only in stories from others, but in my own life.

But our lives are not like a choose-your-own adventure book. The older I get, the more I realize that I probably won't see all my dreams for this life come true. I'll never run a marathon. I doubt I'll ever make it to Australia. It is still possible, if doubtful, that I will one day be a New York Times best-selling author.

Whether my dreams for this life come to fruition in this lifetime or not, I will be in on the ending. I will see the new heaven and earth. My feet will tread the streets of gold and I will have a heavenly address at 8354 Saints Row.

Maybe Moses will be my neighbor.

Record-Keeping (Numbers 33)

Under God's instruction, Moses kept a log of every time they moved, camp by camp. 

In today's passage, Moses added the list of all the stops to the biblical record.

The most likely writing material would have been papyrus. Papyrus was made from papyrus plants, plentiful in Egypt - not likely to be found in the desert.

And Moses did a lot of writing. Earlier he commanded tribal leaders to list the names of all the men of fighting age. He had made a written record of the first three books of the Bible (Genesis, Exodus, Leviticus).  At some point he recorded Numbers and Deuteronomy as well.

With papyrus running at most 25 inches per sheet, that's a lot of papyrus.

When the Egyptians sent them off with gifts of gold and silver, did they include papyrus in the gift bags?

Moses had a royal education. But I've always been amazed at the range of skills exhibited by a people who spent their days making stones for the pyramids.  Musicians and artists, weavers and artists, goldsmiths and clerks.

Today to make a list all we need to do is to pull out our cell phone, not go to the scroll cart and find a blank sheet of papyrus.

Details matter to God. Names, places, times. If He wanted Moses to keep a record, I bet He expects us to account for our time as well.

GOD'S AVENGERS (Numbers 31)

In today's reading, God gave Moses a double-sided commanded: Avenge the people of Israel on the Midianites. After that, you're coming home.

I did wonder if by that point, Moses was more than ready to die. But I also wondered, avenge them for what? (oh, how short my memory is.)

The Midianite women had led the men of Israel astray, and 24,000 died.

Oh, yes. That reason.

But . . . avenge? When I looked for images, all I found were video game and comic book heroes. The 21st century has corrupted the role of avengers to an entertainment sport.

It's also an unexpected command, since God says, "Vengeance is mine; I will repay."

I checked to see if this word is used elsewhere, in the conquest of Canaan, about other tribes they would vanquish. No, it isn't. God only commands vengeance against the Midianites.

Merriam Webster defines avenge as "to exact satisfaction for a wrong by punishing the wrongdoer."

What was the wrong done? Leading the people of Israel into worshipping other gods; pushing the always-hot sex button. Women took the lead in the plot.

God had already punished the Israelites for falling for the temptation; now He wanted Israel to punish Midian for leading them astray. The women were a key component of the temptation. Any right-thinking leader would realize the vengeance must incorporate the women who led them astray, or else, well, they might go back where they started.

12,000 men went to war. They killed all the men and brought home the women. I couldn't help but wonder if a few of the couples who had been together met again. Maybe the guys were hoping for a repetition of the experience, this time almost God-approved?  Our thinking can get really twisted when we want something badly enough.

Moses was furious and ordered that all the women who weren't virgins be put to death.

Hmm, does this story on vengeance have anything to say about the betrayal I've experienced? Well, I wasn't led into sin.  So perhaps not.

WHEN GOD WRITES THE END (Numbers 27)

Today's chapter marks the beginning of the end for Moses. God told him to climb the Abiram Mountains, to look over the Promised Land. "When you've had a good look, you'll be joined to your ancestors in the grave."

Remember all the way back at the burning bush, when Moses argued with God about his commission to lead the people of Israel?

One thing that has struck me in reading the Pentateuch this year is how Moses talked with God.  He learned, he changed. By his later years, he talked with God as though with a long-time, intimate friend. He knew how to push God's buttons--in a good way.

Death wasn't going to interrupt that friendship, and God pointed out that Moses would be joining his brother.

More than forty years after begging God to send someone else to do the job, all he could think about was the people who had aggravated Moses and exasperated him and disappointed him.

Moses more or less said, "I'm thankful I'm joining You and my family in heaven. But what about the people who are still living down here? Don't leave them without a shepherd."

God answered--Joshua would lead the people into the promised land.

That was the end of the discussion. Moses didn't beg God to change His mind, didn't ask for an extension, didn't pout or complain.

Oh, when I come to the end of my days, may I go with such peace.

JOB INTERVIEW (Exodus 34)

You're going to a job interview at the company that's at the top of your list. The job can make or break your career.

The problem is, the last time you worked there, you screwed up big time. They have no reason to take you back, but you're hoping maybe You can point out the things you did well. So you walk into the interview, and you see him. The person you considered your friend and mentor had fired you. You gulp. You can't rationalize your mistakes with this man. Maybe if you offer to work for free. . .

That's the situation Moses faced in Exodus 34. God wanted to wipe Israel out and start over again with Moses. Moses was pleading with God to stay with them, to honor His covenant with the descendants of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob.

Moses had no way to sugarcoat their behavior. Only days before they had worshipped the Golden Calf.  So he admits the truth: we are hard-headed. We are sinners, everyone of us. 

The only one of them who had any glimmer of worthiness was Moses himself. And he offered himself on behalf of his people. "If you see any good in me." 

Then, on behalf of the people who just left slavery behind, Moses asked, "Own us. Possess us." 

What a standard to live up to. God expects nothing less than our complete honesty--we can't exactly hide our sins from Him--and He demands nothing less than our lives. Later in this chapter, He tells them, "No one is to show up in my presence empty-handed."

Applying for a job in God's kingdom is not for the faint of heart.

LOOKING FOR A LEADER? (Exodus 32-33)

Make gods for us who will lead us. Exodus 32:1-3 MSG.

 If I am so special to you, let me in on your plans. Exodus 33:12-13 MSG

 Today I read the story of the golden calves, that ridiculous, foolish, shortsighted decision by the Israelites while Moses was on the mountain. 

Reading the account today, I see that both the Israelites and Moses were impatient. They wanted to know "what next"? But they sought their answers in so very different ways. 

The people begged Aaron "make gods who will lead us." 
Think about that. How can gods that we make ourselves lead us? We might as well make a list of pros and cons or toss a coin. 

Even so, I see a bit of myself in this mistaken quest. As a professional author plagued with health problems, I schedule my days so that I can accomplish my work at a steady pace, no last minute pushes (been there, done that, and I can't any more). 

It's a tool, and a good one. But I tend to overdo. When I was a teenager and a friend showed up unannounced, my aunt informed her, "She can't see you now. You're not on the calendar."

Yup, I can depend too much on my schedule and not allow God to change my plans.

And oh, boy, how Moses's prayer echoes so many of my own. "I know I am special to You. But how about letting me in on Your plans?" 

And God's answer to me is about what God told Moses, although I haven't received any unique, cleft-in-the-rock visits by God. He still doesn't tell me what's next--He reassures me of Who's next--God. He is my constant companion and will guide me where I should go. 

Follow God--and don't rely on man-made tools. Easier than it sounds. 

CUSTOMER COMPLAINTS (Exodus 16)

You haven't been complaining to us--you've been complaining to God! (Exodus 16:8, MSG)

What would you think if the next time you called a business to complain about the service,  God answered the phone?

I don't know about you, but I've done my share of complaining this week. So when I read Moses's words to the Israelites, I said to myself, "ouch!"

They asked, "Why did you bring us out of Egypt in order to starve us to death?" 

Did they really doubt that the God who brought them through the sea on dry land before drowning the Egyptians was going to let them starve? Apparently so. 

It's easy to fall into the trap of basing on my faith on how I feel this morning. And this week I've had several bad days, days when I have had to wait for aides for an hour, and then listened to them grouch and complain as if taking care of me wasn't their job. 

So I complained about it. To other aides. To other residents. Did I accomplish anything? Not what I wanted. I got others upset as well, instead of lifting them up and encouraging them to gentleness and peacefullness and joy.

On top of that, I was really complaining to God. "Why did You stick me here, with these people who don't care about me?" 

It's not even true. Some of the workers might see me as little more than an item on their checklist, it's true, but they do work hard and try to take care of everyone. 

I don't need to be a doormat--but I can extend grace. And patience.

The good thing is, God listens. He's the person I should have "complained" to in the first place. 

And every now and then He sends a day like today when the night staff comes when called and the morning staff gets me up first instead of last.

My manna and quail from heaven. 

WHEN YOUR ENEMY WANTS A BLESSING. . . (Exodus 12)

At last Pharaoh had had enough. It took the death of his firstborn son, but he couldn't get rid of the Israelites soon enough. In so many words, he said "Skedaddle! You, your wives, your children, your livestock, your belongings. Don't let the door hit you on the way out." 

At the end of his frantic plea for Moses and the Israelites to leave, Pharaoh tacks on a strange request "and bless me."

After God had devastated Egypt's livestock, crops, people, water--why did Pharaoh think Moses would agree to bless him?

Why did Pharaoh want a blessing from this stranger's God?

I think it might be as simple as this: In asking for a blessing, Pharaoh laid his last bit of pride on the line. The word for blessing is connected to the word for "kneel." The author of Hebrews says that the greater blesses the lesser.

By asking for a blessing, Pharaoh admitted that Moses and his God were powerful that Egypt and its gods. 


Here's my great, "spiritual" takeaway: Sometimes a blessing is the best revenge. 

TELLING YOUR STORY (Exodus 10)

I've made him stubborn, him and his servants, so I can force him to look at these signs, and so you'll be able to tell your children. (Genesis 10:1-2, MSG)

God made Pharaoh stubborn for two reasons: the first was make  him look at the signs God sent. I'm focusing on the second: "So you'll be able to tell your children."

In the words of a song popular when I was in college, "if I never had a problem, I wouldn't know God could solve them."  

Times God came through when all seemed hopeless--those are the stories God wants me to tell my children and grandchildren. There's the Christmas God gave us a microwave (important since we only had a stovetop). How about all those contracts I received just as an expense cropped up? Or when God gave us the apartment of our dreams? 

If I hadn't known poverty, or illness, or homelessness, or grief--I wouldn't know how God could work in those situations.

In a way, that's why I started this blog: God has done things for me that I'm bursting to share with others. 

I'd love to hear some of your stories, about times God has acted on your behalf. 

DRAFT NOTICE (Exodus 7)

I will have my way with Egypt and bring out my soldiers, my people the Israelites, from Egypt with mighty acts of judgment. (Exodus 7:4, MSG)

It's hard to imagine a less likely army than the Israelites. They were slaves, used to hard physical labor but with weak constitutions because of their living conditions. They obviously weren't unified (look at all the later squabbling), and they hadn't learned to think like free men. 

God called this group of ill-prepared, wishy washy, unwilling people His soldiers. No elite soldiers here. No volunteers, but all draftees. 

Unwilling soldiers with an unwilling general (God, please send someone else.)

These are the people God used to accomplish one of the most spectacular freedom marches in history?

Today God calls us His soldiers. At least that's the image He gave us through Paul, in Ephesians 6. He urges us to be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power--the same power that freed the Israelites. He tells us to put on battle gear, the armor of God. 

So I'm at war. Today. Sitting here in my wheelchair.

The good news is that God won the battle. He knocked Pharaoh off his pedestal while the Israelites watched, ready to march when He gave the order. 

Sometimes I watch God at work. Other times I'm on the front line. But I'm always in the army, and God is always on my side. 

Muster up.

HIGHER STANDARD (Exodus 4)

God said to Moses in Midian: "Go. Return to Egypt. All the men who wanted to kill you are dead." (Exodus 4:19, MSG)

God repeated the order He had already given to Moses at the burning bush: It's time for you to go back to Egypt. He had answered all of Moses's questions and sent Aaron to meet him. Moses had taken the first step: telling his father-in-law Jethro that he was leaving. 

After Moses had taken the first steps, God stepped in with the reassurance, "all the men who wanted to kill you are dead." 

Why didn't God say so in the first place? Why did God wait until after Moses obeyed to offer reassurance? 

All along, God seems a little abrupt with Moses. If I wrote dialogue like occurs between God and Moses, when He says "And who do you think made the human mouth?", I might say he snapped. God got downright angry when Moses said, "Please send someone else." 

On top of all of that, God didn't deliver that piece of vital information until Moses was packing his bags. 

Purely a guess: But I think God wanted to toughen Moses up. You know that verse that says God won't give anything more than we can handle? I have often retorted that I wish I was weaker, so I wouldn't have to endure so much. (You've read bits and pieces of it in this blog. If you want to read a fuller story of my travails, starting with my daughter's suicide, check out my other blog, http://darlenefranklinwrites.blogspot.com/)

In the near future, Moses would face off with the most powerful ruler of his time, the Pharaoh of Egypt. He would spend 40 years (and not the maximum of eight years afforded to an American president) leading the people of Israel through the desert, their security and well-being resting on his shoulders. Moses had to have absolute, clear-cut, no-questions-asked kind of faith in God to fulfill his calling. 

Of course God supernaturally enabled Moses.

But along the way He toughened him up. Starting with calling him back from Egypt. 

If it ever seems like God has given you more than your fair share of trials--maybe God has something extraordinary He is calling you to do. 

INHERITANCE (Genesis 49)

Jacob's farewell blessings to his son is one of my favorite parts of Genesis. In spite of the history of rivalry and favoritism, Jacob understood his sons. He knew their natures, and he gave each one "the blessing appropriate to him." (Genesis 49:28, NIV)

So I'm not sure how I missed this before. Some of the so-called blessings read more like back-handed compliments, like Issachar: "When he saw how good the place was, how pleasant the country, he gave up his freedom and went to work as a slave." (Genesis 49:14-15)

Two of the brothers didn't even receive that much. They received, not a blessing, not a criticism, but a downright curse: Simeon and Levi. The two brothers had killed the men of Shechem after the prince raped their sister, but Jacob's words suggest their tempers continued unabated throughout their lives. He said, "A curse on their uncontrolled anger, on their indiscriminate wrath." (Genesis 49:7)  

The terms of their curse? They would be scattered throughout Israel instead of having land of their own.

That sounds close to disinheriting his sons to me. 

In case you're wondering, Jacob's prophecy did come true. As the priestly tribe, Levi received no land; and Simeon's allotment was swallowed up by Judah. 


But think about that. From the riotous, angry, murdering, Levi came the lawgiver Moses. (Come to think of it, Moses was a murderer too. Hmm.)  And of course his brother Aaron instituted the priesthood. 

God took the curse and turned it into something amazingly beautiful.  Like He had already done with using Joseph to save the known world during the famine. 

What harm I do or intend - and no matter what harm has been done to me - doesn't write "the end."

It only ends when God says so. Changed. Redeemed.

Praise the Lord.